I’m using a throwaway because this situation is messy and I needed somewhere to vent.
Growing up, I had a small college fund my mom set up before she passed away. After my dad remarried, my stepmom took over the finances. Every Christmas, about $5,000 from that fund would mysteriously disappear for decorations, gifts, and family trips. Whenever I questioned it, my dad brushed it off with “It’s family money” or “We’ll make it up later.” They never did.
Eventually my parents went bankrupt while I was still in school, and the college fund was completely gone. I had to work three jobs to finish college. I missed parties, holidays, and most of the normal college experience. After graduating, I went low contact because the resentment was overwhelming.
Years later, I’m finally stable—not wealthy, but doing okay. Out of nowhere, my dad contacted me asking for $40,000. He called it a “loan” but wouldn’t explain what it was for. I calmly said no.
The next day, I opened my door and found my dad and stepmom standing there. They had pressured my aunt into giving them my address. My dad immediately snapped, accusing me of still holding a grudge over the college fund. He said feeding me and giving me a roof for 18 years cost more than the money they took and that I should “grow up” and help my family.
I simply told them to leave and closed the door. Now I’m wondering if I handled it right.