An elderly woman walked into a bank and handed her card to the teller.
“I’d like to withdraw $500,” she said.
The teller replied sharply, “Withdrawals under $5,000 must be done at the ATM.”
“Why?” the woman asked.
“Those are the rules,” the teller said impatiently. “There’s a line behind you.”
Without a word, the woman handed the card back. “Then please help me withdraw all my money.”
The teller checked the account and nearly gasped. Leaning closer, she said politely, “I’m sorry, ma’am. You have $3.5 million, but we don’t have that much cash today. You’ll need an appointment.”
“How much can I withdraw now?” the woman asked.
“Up to $300,000.”
“I’ll take that,” she said.
Moments later, the teller handed her the money with great respect. The woman placed $500 in her purse and returned the remaining $299,500.
“Please deposit the rest back,” she smiled.
Later that week, at the DMV, 85-year-old Doris proudly announced she’d driven for 65 years without a single ticket.
After questionable eyesight, slow reactions, and news that her pink Cadillac was blocking four spaces—with the blinker on—she was advised to stop driving.
“I’ll quit,” Doris said confidently, “the day I forget where my keys are.”
“Ma’am,” the clerk said, “they’re in your hand.”
Doris laughed. “Then I’m still good to go!”
And she drove off—blinker still flashing. 🚗😄